Ghosting has gone too far. This pervasive silent trend infiltrating our professional pursuits is beyond comprehension. We MUST collectively agree: it's time to rein in ghosting culture. Whether in matters of the heart or careers, the deafening silence following an unanswered message is more than a social faux pas—it's a symptom of a society adrift. Let's restore the dignity of communication and ourselves, let's preserve virtue as we fade into the ghostly echoes of our virtual existence.
I always believed certain cultural aspects, like empathy, equality, and basic access to healthcare, would never pass the cold hand of "professionalism." Yet somehow, here we are, and ghosting has snuck past to the heart of millions as the new cool kid on the block. I understand the aversion to confrontation; delivering bad news is tough. Life, undoubtedly, is challenging. But why do we operatorate with this collective obsession with sidestepping difficulties while pretending to crave change?
Change demands effort. Yet, opting for the path of avoidance is default. No need for a 30-second two-sentence email, text, or DM. It's time to confront the irony: our fear of discomfort is hindering the very change we claim to desire.
Freelancing is a reality brimming with excitement. The pursuit, rejections, negotiations, and the thrill of new opportunity. Even when you don't clinch the bid or botch a job, there's a certain allure. However, there's a GLARING issue that tests my patience: ghosting. I enjoy dissecting motivations, seeking understanding at the core. Yet, truth be told, my three rationalizations for such behavior are merely a faith saving exercise.
Let's not "sugarcoat" It: immaturity, normalized within the fabric of our conversational medium. Ghosting, rather than a complex web of reasons, often boils down to an unfortunate truth: the casual acceptance of basic immaturity in the art of communication.
1st Rationalization: They have been busy
In the twisted reality of my Instagram hustle, I navigate the DM landscape like a 20-year-old college student on a covert mission. Unfortunatley my goal is not to charm a potential love interest, but to pitch my services to artists, influencers, stores...basically, anyone with an inbox. Here's the thing: there's a clear line between being left on read and the theatrical act of ghosting. Ghosting, in my book, requires a prior exchange - an established connection disrupted. This connection might be >8 messages with discussion of a specfic project, meeting, or opportunity.
So, you get a reply. MAYBE even set a date or outline plans for a collab. New lesson: don't bank on anything until contracts are signed and a deposit hits your account. Goodwill won't pay the rent, trust me, I've tested it.
You wait. Three days, a follow-up. Five more days, another message. No response? But wait, they're posting on Instagram? You're confused, but get it. Then you notice it: "Seen 3 hours ago." Excitement bubbles up—surely, they're just caught up in the chaos of their business, right? WRONG.
No answer. No explanation. The excuse of a chaotic business becomes a tired refrain. I get it; everyone's busy. But in the world of small business, relationships are currency, and Instagram is the FUCKING bank!
I don't harbor personal feelings about the individuals conducting business this way; it's just not my style. What brews, though, is a cynical loss of faith. Adults perpetuating this teenage normalcy—a cycle that, while not infuriating, leaves me questioning the integrity of community and business. Yet, I'm not angry, just disillusioned...as Bowling for Soup would say "high school never ends."
2nd Rationalization: They went in another direction
Venturing into the realm of monetized creativity means offering a service that transcends mere function - it becomes about delivering an "image" infused with your distinctive style. Defining this style becomes crucial. A daunting task akin to a chameleon avoiding camouflage. The weighty expectation to specialize and maintain the sanctity of "the brand" is relentless. It creates a dual purpose: setting clear client expectations and delineating an identifiable audience. Both aspects are important, comprehensible, yet fucking repetitive & annoying. I wholeheartedly understand and agree with the essence of this. Particularly within the realm of photography, where the artistry is ostensibly accessible to anyone with a camera, which is EVERYONE. It's as if they're suggesting that your love for Dr. Pepper inhibits you from savoring a Snapple. Perhaps I'm digressing, but at the core, my assertion is this: one secures employment based on the ability to manifest an image with the unmistakable imprint of their unique style.
Initially, businesses or individuals might think they crave a particular style, only to later discover or chance upon someone whose aesthetic or preferences align more closely with their vision. While I do agree that acknowledging the frustration of this shift without lingering excessively is fine, but it's important to realize that a plethora of talented individuals navigate various creative trajectories. A client's redirection NEVER diminishes the uniqueness of your style. However, must we silently endure the disrespect that comes with a lack of communication? Tolerance may be necessary, but fully embracing such disregard is an entirely different proposition.
Opting for someone else is perfectly acceptable, even encouraged if it enables the client's attainment of their goals. Yet, amidst this professional transaction, let's pause and remember that we are all just individuals navigating this peculiar era on our floating rock. Seeking, searching to craft memorable and meaningful experiences. As the most rudimentary courtesies erode, our "culture" atrophys.
Don't hire me. Text Me Back.
3rd Rationalization: No Budget
Setting your price isn't just a financial decision; it's a psychological battlefield, where the demons of low self-esteem and "imposter syndrome" can lead to undervaluing your craft. Now, the act of pricing below market standard is a double-edged sword, providing a foot in the competitive door while undercutting your true worth.
Hourly rates and standard pricing models falter in capturing the intricacies of the creative process. Editing complexities and the iterative nature of refining work defy neat calculations. Negotiation emerges as an art, not just a transaction, reflecting your worth and a willingness to engage in a financial dance for mutual satisfaction.
In the realm of photography, it's more than a business transaction—it's a visceral connection to community and environments. The allure of collaborating with local businesses and contributing to deeply rooted communities fuels passion. Yet, amid this idealism, a harsh reality remains—meticulously calculated worth may clash with the financial realities of potential clients. In this theatrical landscape of pricing, a dramatic negotiation unfolds, a dance between desiring fair compensation and the awareness that your craft may not always align with the financial constraints of those seeking your services.
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